Humor

Hohenwarter: Student to bring book to Juice Jam, just in case

Sophomore Alyssa Koenig, now older and wiser, has decided to bring a book to this year’s Juice Jam concert, scheduled for Sept. 13 at Skytop Field.

Koenig, a 20-year-old television, radio and film major, has decided the inevitable wisecracks from her friends and onlookers is still a better solution than pretending “Club Going Up (On a Tuesday)” is still a catchy or culturally relevant song.

Koenig admits she had a fun time last year despite a few lackluster performances.

“I’m a huge Schoolboy Q fan and still had a tough time enjoying his set last year,” Koenig said. “I think something about people in bucket hats flocking en mass to a performance has a way of stripping the artistry out of a concert. Literally so many bucket hats…”

Like many SU students, Koenig experienced a wave of emotions in the weeks leading up to Juice Jam as she learned The Weeknd was attending, but then, wait, actually not attending, this year’s festival.



“I was all prepared to have a borderline religious experience when The Weeknd played ‘Tell Your Friends’, so at this point the line-up is just white noise,” she said. “I might even just bring my iPod and listen to The Weeknd in the back of the concert. If I get drunk enough I probably won’t even notice the difference.”

As to what book she plans to bring, Koenig said, “I’m reading this Ernest Hemingway book right now. It’s pretty good. The narrative is moving along pretty slow but so is Matt and Kim’s career since ‘Daylight’ came out in 2009.”

Not a total pessimist, Koenig admits that, in addition to some light reading, there are elements of this year’s Juice Jam festival she is excited for.

“That chicken on a stick they serve is so goddamn good. I’m going to eat like six of those.”





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